Woops.

Well, let me just say sorry for my own laziness over the past few weeks or so. :) I'm glad to catch back up on the good old blog, I must say.
How is life..how is life? Hmm. Quite the question. I am having a great time actually! Still working on remembering that each day comes as it comes, and that me fretting about the future is not doing anyone any good. Though, of course, it still becomes an issue now and again. :) However, I'm slowly learning more and more how to keep that fear of the "next step" from inhibiting me in the present, which can only continue to inhibit me in the future.
I am home for the weekend, and it feels good to be here with my family. I miss them so much sometimes when I am gone, and it's been almost two months since I last saw my parents, so I am definitely enjoying time at home with them (and my precious Fiona). :)
Each day continues as a process of processing, as I like to say. Processing not only my semester abroad, but life in general, and all the new info I receive as I go along. I have started to become more and more interested in dedicating myself to really living simply, and not only to do that on my own, but also to share that type of living in a community of believers. My capstone class (It's my favorite class, ever, can't lie) is challening to me; challenging to my ideas about the world, about what peace means in this world, and about just everything in general basically! :) I enjoy a good time of deep conversation and thinking in the midst of a lot of shallowness, it reminds me a lot of my Costa Rica time in LASP when all of life was basically intense. :)
Well, it's 12:58, and even though for me, that's early, I figure I'll use the fact that everyone here around me is sleeping to justify turning in. Don't worry, I'm sure I"ll be back soon. Cuidate!
Peace & Love

Sleeping In...

So there's this song I love by Nevertheless called "Sleeping In"... Here's the part that strikes me:

"I've been sleeping in for days, Cause when I am awake, I will have to face my life. And I get carried away like I'm the only one, Who's ever felt the way that I do. But I can hear you say you're not the only one, everybody hopes to get through."

Sometimes, I love sleeping in. Okay, a lot of times I love it. But sometimes I really do feel like I'm sleeping in because I'm trying to avoid it. Life. Change. Hurt. Love. Loss. all the good and all the bad things of life. Why? I don't know, honestly. It's a scary thing, living! There are days (most days) when I feel good and loved and trustful of all things God has coming my way. Yet, there are those days when I want to eternally hit the alarm clock, in my dream world where nothing really changes, where I don't have to move on, where people I love aren't left somewhere behind me. The beauty in life is the fact that it changes, and I know I can't see how beautiful things are without sometimes having to walk through the rain to get there. But there are those days, those times, when I lose some trust in life, in myself, and yes, even in God. I've gotta admit it, I've got to be true. It hurts me to feel that way on those days. I mean, how can I doubt the One who loves me more than I can ever even fathom? How can I doubt the love of the cross?

I know I shouldn't overly beat myself up for feeling this way. Like the song says, "you're not the only one, everybody hopes to get through." I do hope to get through, and I do believe deep down that I will get through. Today is just one of those days where, for some reason, I start to doubt what I can do through Christ's power and love. I can do ANY THING through Christ who gives me strength. (Phil. 4:13) Why do I forget how much I've already done, how far Christ has already brought me? Just one of those days when I need to remind myself of how loved, how blessed, and how powerful Christ can be within me if I ask Him to come in and take my life....

Whew, I can't think about it all anymore..so until la proxima vez. Amor y Paz....

El primer post!

So this blogging thing I think is going to make my mind say "whew" at the end of every night! Why, you ask? Well, it's this little thing called LIFE that sometimes seems to make my head spin out of control :)

Since I returned from my semester abroad in Costa Rica, life has been great, I mean I really have no complaints. (Minus that it's cold here..and I lost my tan) Haha no, but honestly, life is good! But there's just this part of me, some part that feels lost, that doesn't believe I really did all the things I now see myself doing in pictures. What a weird place the mind is, yeah? That I can spend four months somewhere, come home, and all the sudden it's like it never happened. I'm still trying to deal with that reality change...

And as I deal with one change...here comes the next!....Graduation...basically a four letter word! Haha just with 10 letters. ;) I think that's why this semester feels so overwhelming to me, even though I have the least amount of credits ever (12..awesome) I feel more stressed than I think I ever have in college. Boo. That's not how it should be! Perhaps it's this thing called the "Real World" everyone keeps bringing up. Though, I don't really think the real world is so tough and scary...I mean, if I can pee in the ocean for a week with the Kuna, and plan a sweet spring break trip in a country I've never been to, what CAN'T I do? :)

Well folks...I've gotten out my words for tonight..until next time....stay classy.

With the peace & love of Christ.